What are you?

A blog dedicated to four college students' creative adventures and self-growth.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

The Adventure Never Ends

I'm so grateful that I was able to participate in the Creative Adventures blog. As a writer I seek new experiences that inspire a drive to create. Adventures are perfect for this, but sometimes we need the comfort of a group and the pressure of a deadline to pursue one.

Although the prospect of giving away free hugs, writing a love song, and dressing tacky seem simple enough, with all three I felt my stomach fill with butterflies. It's not just these challenges though, in many situations I find that I respond to fear by flying away to the next place of comfort. But sometimes the steady rush of a beating heart can fill you with excitement. Imagine a girl with a hundred yellow butterflies glowing through her stomach. She is ready to take off, she has the potential--will she seize the day? I completed all three challenges, because creativity is approachable. Nothing and no one can stop me from expressing myself and creating my life but myself.

The free hugs challenge was a great way for me to communicate with the people I see every day on campus. Our student body is overwhelming, and as a transfer, out-of-state student, it was easy for me to get caught up in the routine paths to and from classes without thinking about the hundreds of anonymous faces I passed along the way. But I've left that autopilot mindset behind and will now walk through campus, downtown, even the supermarket engaged and aware of the space I share with people, some of whom may be in need of a hug.

Writing a love song was nerve wracking at first, but how could I not perform and write a song when I was faced with the challenge and had the equipment? The day after I posted my love song was my birthday, and as creations tend to be, the song was like a gift to myself. Hopefully, I won't need a challenge next time I want to write a song. Lyrics are lovely words strung together with sound, and I could definitely write more. I've tried to listen more carefully for melodies since then, and I've discovered that there are so many sounds and rhythms of the day.

Tacky day was fun and a tactful way of standing out. It made me realize the potential in every article of clothing. As of now I know I own too too too many clothes and plan of giving some away, selling some, and altering others. All in all it's not what you wear, but how you wear it.

I'm excited to finish up this school semester, but it's always sad to say goodbye to a project. Of course this won't mean an end to the adventures, and I have a few in mind. I recently disassemble my bed and put my mattress on the floor. Much more comfortable I must say, but I'm left with 5 long panels of wood in my possession. I think I might use them to put together a room divider to place over my doorway. This summer I'm also heading beginning an internship with this great alternative medicine website, and beginning volunteer DJ shifts at my school's radio station. I also have two guitars, a ukulele, and a tambourine. Songwriting will continue and hopefully flourish over summer break.

At the end of this Creative Adventure blog the real question is: What is your next adventure?

The DDD

Adventurer 1 Signing Off

Well, it's been an interesting few weeks, and what started out as a list of stunts turned into something deep. I learned something from each challenge, but I have my favorites, and my favorites aren't at all what I expected.
The love song challenge takes the number one slot for me. I had it pegged for last place. I love creative writing and, in fact, it is my major as I'm sure I've mentioned somewhere on this blog. My song turned into the laments of characters for me. Seriously I thought about the "plot" of International Lullaby for days after I posted it. What I learned from the challenge is a new way to get the creative juices flowing. I haven't penned another song yet, but I plan on it.
In second place is The Free Hugs Challenge, which is right where I figured it would be. I'm not shy. I used to be, but life taught me (is teaching me) that it's productive to start up a conversation or voice an opinion. In fact, in the real working world, of which I've been a part of and am a part of (I'm a returning student), it's something everyone had better get comfortable with. This challenge solidified my opinion of myself as not being a wallflower when a situation calls for a leader. What I learned, though, is that I can use my personality to uplift others, and that people enjoy, really enjoy, kindness from strangers. Helping someone isn't always about giving financial aid. Anyone has the power to help if help can come in the form of something as simple as a hug.
And finallly, the challenge I thought would be my favorite...Tacky Day. The lesson was profound and I had a great time putting my outfit together. I was impressed with the level of respect people have for each other, though dissapointed that it didn't lead to any conversations. But would it have been better if people behaved badly? I thought so, but on rethink, no it wouldn't have. Why set out to lose faith in the human spirit? It worked out just the way it should have.
On my Tacky Day, I went to visit my dad in the big four-hour gap between classes on Tuesdays. About an hour after arriving, I couldn't help myself and I asked him what he thought about my outfit. He said he hadn't noticed it, then upon inspection, said it was cute. What he was seeing was the person inside that getup. The person who he used to stand on top of his feet and dance around. The person who was visiting because he wasn't feeling well.
We should all be so lucky as to experience a world seeing us for the people we are and not for the made-to-impress junk that we wear.
It's been real, folks, and a wonderful experience. Keep daring to be different, and remember, the comfort zone is not your friend.
See you in blogland.
Adventurer 1

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Reflection

These last three weeks have been fun. I learned a lot about myself. I learned I can wear any outfit and still feel comfortable. I learned I can write a song. Basically, when put to the test, I can do pretty much anything I try. I think I just get lazy at times and I don’t do things because of that reason, but no more, I believe the most challenging things are the most worth it.

My favorite challenge was the love song challenge. I had the most fun coming up with the story for my song. I’m a novel writer, so it challenged my skills in a completely different aspect of writing. I have a new-found respect for song writers. It is one thing to write a poem, but a song is spoken. It has to sound good when read and sung, so certain sound devices have to be considered. I had the most fun coming up with the story for my song.

My least favorite challenge was the tacky day, just because it was hard to find something to wear that was actually tacky. Just a theory, but I think subconsciously I tried to match. When I was a kid, I couldn’t match for the life of me. But eventually, I trained my brain to recognize what matches and what doesn’t. Just a theory though.

The challenges I had the most trouble with were tacky day and free hug day. I’m a shy person when it comes to strangers. Free Hug Day really put me out there and into the spotlight, so much so, I wasn’t use to all of the attention.

Overall, it was a great three weeks! :)

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Wrap up and Reflection

The third and final challenge week has come and gone. The group originally planned to do three weeks, and each member has succeeded in all of the challenges. Since this is the end, we will now do a week of reflections concerning what we each learned through these three weeks and how this challenge blog changed us.

Feel free to elaborate on which was your favorite challenge, your least favorite, and the one you had the most trouble with. Anything you feel readers need to know, Group, is what we need to know!

Tacky Day!

I did the challenge on Tuesday, and I found it was pretty hard to try to dress tacky. I tried to put on colors that would not go, but somehow, it still looked good. Even my hair in two little buns on the sides of my head looked cute, which I've always found to be tacky. The only things that were actually tacky were my cuffed pants, knee-high monkey socks, and sandals.

When walking around campus, no one said anything to me. A few people just stared briefly. In my classes, a few of my classmates asked about my wardrobe, but most didn't even notice. I guess in college, people are used to others wearing outrageous clothing.

This challenge also did a lot for my confidence. I knew I was in ridiculous clothing, but I didn't care. I smiled at the stares. I definitely rocked it.

I probably won't do Tacky Day again, but then again, all of the stuff I pulled out was cute. So maybe I will one of these days.

"Is it pajama day?"

As a way to explore the phenomenon known as "wearing pajamas to class," which I have always found a bit tacky, I decided to wear the worse combination of sleeping clothes I owned.

My pants were hot pink fleece with a Hello Kitty print; my shirt a yellow tanktop with assorted small print; my jacket a cropped gray heart-embroidered creature; and my shoes overly large leopard print boot slippers.

Walking to class was probably the hardest part. I passed so many people, including a little girl who looked enthusiastic to see Hello Kitty. Many were businessmen with scowls on their face, but I decided that if I was to wear anything, I would do it in confidence.

Arriving in class, I found that I was more comfortable than normal. Many people laughed and said my pajamas were cute or that I looked comfortable, and I assured them that I was. No one was outright rude to me or even ridiculed my strange clothes, something that I hypothesized was a social convention not to openly insult someone who dresses ridiculous--at least to their face. While I cannot vouch for what was said in secret, I was met only with openness and excitement.

Would I wear my pajamas to class again? Well, no. Not unless I was running really late in the morning. But I did find that acting confident even in strange clothes gives you an air of normalcy. Wear anything with your chin up, and no one will bother you.

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Tacky is the New Cute

Tacky day sprung up on me this week. It’s my birthday weekend and as such, a time to look cute! Before I knew it the week was coming to an end so I had to squeeze in the tackiness for Thursday. I anticipated this challenge to be the most difficult for me as I usually dress the way I feel. Sometimes not doing so can throw my day off balance.

I rummaged through purple bins of clothes and picked out an aqua blue shirt with the kanji symbol for serenity printed in black. I thought of this shirt immediately when I heard of the challenge; a perfect excuse to wear a shirt I love, but always thought was more appropriate for …sleep attire or sick days. Matched together with a black and white striped skirt the tackiness was increasing. This skirt is also one of my favorite pieces, but I would have never thought of putting the two together if tacky hadn’t been on my mind. I slipped on some coffee colored penny loafers and went outside to check out the weather. The morning was a bit chilly so I picked out my favorite fuchsia knit hoodie, and a glittery fuchsia and turquoise scarf for pizzazz. “Matching is tacky,” I heard the high school fashionista in me cry. And with that I believed my outfit was tacky approved. On to face the public.

In deciding what to wear, I thought about what tacky really meant. I don’t believe it means feeling uncomfortable about what you’re wearing. But was I tacky enough? I actually liked what I was wearing. It’s definitely something I wouldn’t have worn normally. It was, however, colorful and different and I liked it! Not your t-shirt and jeans kind of outfit. As I walked to my car, the trees seemed to look at me funny. Inside my house, sure it was fun to place dress up, but with the world in the background it became something else. My bold colors were striking, but throughout the day I didn’t notice any strange glances. I had a meeting with my advisor and she said I looked cute. I had my computer with me, which is also fuchsia. I guess if my outfit matches my computer, tackiness is truly accomplished.

The outfit and I drove 5 hours to Kentucky where I picked up my friend who was going to ride back with me to celebrate my birthday in Atlanta. I had a birthday dinner with my parents who didn’t say anything about what I was wearing. They were only happy to see me. I guess this proves that you can wear anything this day and age. I am happy with my tack experience. If I ever get bored with neutral colors, I’ll keep tacky day in mind. I’m sure come up with something ridiculously awesome.

The DDD

Friday, April 8, 2011

The Tacky Show

The Outfit: A dark blue shirt with red collar and red horizontal stripes from my first job working in fast food. A pair of light grey pants with thin dark grey vertical stripes, a "Hammer-Time" low hanging crotch, and elastic waist. A yellow scarf was knotted around my neck. A pair a black tennis shoes with high reaching white socks completed the look. Oh yeah and a short sleeved wool, belted, grey shawl thingie. The shawl, when paired with a respectable outfit, really isn't that bad.

On my way to class, I stopped by the Shell gas station to get the second half of my breakfast, a diet soda with caffeine. I walked in with a cheery "hello", grabbed my soda and went to pay for it. The clerk didn't seem fazed. I don't know if it was a statement about his typical clientele, but I decided to try for a reaction. I said, "I hope I can beat that traffic and get to my interview on time."
At that his eyebrows went up and he said, "Go for it."

On the expressway I realized my pants were made of some horrible itchy fabric and I began twitching in my seat. In the parking deck at school, I gave my legs a good going over before leaving the car. Can't scratch like that in front of people.
I decided, after careful consideration, that my persona for tacky day was Diva. I went into the restroom and stood in front of the mirror fluffing my Afro, twisting this way and that and grinning with approval. As women came to the sinks, I began to fuss with my lipstick choices before making a poor color choice and applying it.
What I noticed right off the bat is that with a high held head, a confident glint in the eye, and a strut, no one says anything. No one laughs.
I went to my usual seat in the theater-styled classroom. Front row. I looked as many people in the face as I could, with my chin tilted two inches higher than normal, without missing a step and hurtling toward the professor's desk. Not one smirk. So, I took my seat. I checked myself to be absolutely sure I was tacky, and indeed I was a hot mess.
After that class, it was off to Russian where my classmates chatted with me with not a second glance at my getup.
Here's something else, I myself couldn't have cared less about my outfit. I was neither embarrassed or apologetic. I was me. I didn't know what to make of that. Is it a sign of conceit? Self confidence? Or maybe our outfits matter less than we think, even to ourselves.
It got me to thinking about the lack of reactions. I wanted to be laughed at, questioned, and ridiculed. Didn't happen. I was, for the majority of the day, on a college campus where self-expression runs amok. But I think it's more than that. I think that it has little to do with a confident air and more to do with the fact that most of us are the stars of our own show. And when everyone is the star, there is no audience. What am I saying here? I'm not entirely sure, but I know that fewer people tune in to our show than we all think...

The next day I went to the mailbox with my sweeping broom in hand, a pink fluffy housecoat, and unshaped hair. This better not become a habit.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Challenge #3

Congratulations on everyone who completed Challenge #2, the love song! I'm really impressed by the quality of submissions!

Now, Challenge #3. This will be the most challenging in the group, and it is our last challenge for the three week span. In this challenge, each group member will dress in a tacky way and attend class. They will then report how it felt to dress awkwardly and be the center of either positive or negative attention. Bonus points for those who don't tell the class what they're doing so that everyone just thinks they're awkwardly dressed because they want to be!

"ididnt know lovely 2"



had to write a love song
does this sound like love?
yeah i'm talking to you
and there's always a “you”
in a love song

could it be that you carried me at a frequency
higher than the trees
so high i couldn’t see

how to right a love song
when i love wrong
and it’s all about you
but i think about me
in a love song

could it be you won’t carry me
at a frequency
riding with the leaves
so high i can’t see

could it be you that carried me
and there's always a you
but it all about me
so high i can’t see
and does that
does that sound like love?
(repeat)

Finally finished this challenge and wrote my first original song. I play music, I like to sing, and I'm a student of Poetry, but I've always felt intimidated by songwriting. It was difficult in the beginning to merge the sound with words. Lyrics are my favorite though, close to poetry but more spare and mysterious. They can be cliché and repetitive because the sound carries the phrase. They also don't have to make any sense, and yet together with the sound, the song can make perfect sense. Anyway, :"> I recorded a million times trying to get it right, but I had to stop that. It’s Sunday already and no time to mull over perfection. I'll definitely keep working on lyrics and songwriting. Music's too stimulating to ignore.

Next time with feeling,

The DDD

Saturday, April 2, 2011

Love In A Mist

Love In A Mist

You are my dream
You are my world
The mist moves in
You faded away

When I needed you
You were not here
Who do I blame?
Doubt haunts me
Like a veil of mist

(Chorus)
The flower
Oh, how pretty blue
Your thorns ward me off
But I see past it
Love in a mist

After the mist clears
I see you standing
You tell me its okay
Why did I doubt you?
You are still my world


(Chorus)


Like a star in the sky
You are always there
No matter what


(Chorus)


Love in a mist
Love in a mist
Love in a mist
Love in a mist



I liked this challenge. I used to write poetry back in the day, so this reminded me of those days. The song is the story of a girl and boy in love, but one doubts the other's love. The girl's thoughts are in the verses and the boy's thoughts are in the chorus. Will I write another song? Probably not. Song writing is hard, and I commend people who do it. Songs have a certain structure. Maybe I'm just not used to the structure, but I will stick with writing fiction. The challenge was fun though; it definitely challenged me to write something that is different than what I'm used to.

Friday, April 1, 2011

International Lullaby

(Verse 1)
любить (infinitive verb, meaning "to love" pronounced "Lewbeet") the beat of my heart
I knew from the start
That man was trouble
любить the beat of the dance
Never cared for romance
I remember the coolness of his touch
Never felt that much
That man gave me such a rush

(Chorus)
My Russian love
My international love
Winter days snow-capped nights
What has ever felt so right
My Russian lover
My international lover
Chilled days blazing hot nights
What has ever felt that right

(Verse 2)
любить the feelings I feel
His kiss, his touch It's real
I'm beside myself
Think of nothing else
This man has control
He's in my soul

(Chorus)
My Russian love
My international love
Warm-wrapped nights
Holding him tight
My Russian lover
My international lover
It's real It's real It's so real

(Bridge)
Lying in my lonely bed tonight
I think of Russian ice, My sexy Moscovite
The people throwing white rice
I see the light, I think I'm leaving tonight
First plane out, I'm going back
Friends, family understand, I'm leaving my homeland
Never been so bold and I hate the cold
But here I am packing a winter coat

(Music) ( Russian phrases spoken by male in background, English translation not part of song, added only for reader benefit)

(Verse 3)
Good morning
(Добрый день любовника ; Good morning, lover)
It's so right to be here with you
My love, my Russian love, my international love
Be with me
(Я хочу ; I want to)
Forever
(Давай ; Let's)
Snow-capped days, nights wrapped tight
My Russian lullaby
(Моя жена ; My wife)

Okay, so...
I haven't written a song since I was, like, nine years old. My cousin and I had decided we were going to become a rap duo a la Salt n' Peppa. We wrote our raps and performed them on our grandmother's front porch. Shudder. I still remember parts of those songs. Yes, they sucked.
Fast forward...
I now present to you, with my prestigious lyric writing background, International Lullaby. I admit, of the three challenges, I looked forward to this one the least. But turns out I enjoyed writing my song. I even kind of got teary at the end. I know the mechanics are off. Verse 2 is really short etc., but I like my little project. I think I will be writing more songs. It was an escape, not entirely unlike fiction writing, but not as cumbersome. Fiction lays on you, like a heavy cloak. You wear it and surround yourself with it and become immersed in the world you're creating. With a song, there's more freedom. Like pouring out feelings and thoughts without worrying that you're contradicting something written way back on page 119. A song lets you be as creative as possible with the short time allotted to express yourself.
I'll stop here before this becomes a novel.
Great challenge idea, team!